RTDM: Jennifer Kipphut
Jennifer Kipphut
Personal Trainer
Charlotte, North Carolina
We want to get to know you! Briefly tell us about yourself: Where you came from, where you've been and how you're living your dream?
In late 2018, I lost my husband and partner in crime to a rare form of Lymphoma. He was only 39 and it was only 13 months from his diagnosis to his death. We were together for over 20 years, married for 14, and have nearly 6 year old identical twin boys. Chris and I traveled this world together. We visited 25+ countries, lived for nearly a decade in London, England and were in it for the long haul. His death felt and still feels like I have lost part of my own heart. Overnight, or at least it felt like that, my life and the life of my children changed forever. I went from living the American dream (loving husband, big house, 2 kids and days spent in the gym or lunching with friends) to being a single mom with no job. So in February of 2019, I put my personal training certificate to use and started my own concierge personal training business. It was a risk but one I had to take. Prior to being a stay at home mom I was in the corporate world and could not imagine returning to the life of airports and hotel with 2 young children and no family to help. I started with a post on a local facebook group and have been steadily growing by word of mouth. I have used my own tragedy to build resilience and strength in others. However, even more important to me, I am helping my clients learn to love and give gratitude to their bodies for serving them everyday. Something that Chris' body could not do.
How do you define success?
I wish I had a better answer to this question. In my heart, success comes from one person feeling like I have improved their life. In reality, I am responsible for my family... so I guess success comes when I can balance helping others with being able to provide for myself and my children.
What did it take to make your dream happen and how do you make it sustainable?
It took someone telling me no. That no made me cry for about 2 days. It was a good ole fashion pity party. Then I got myself together and made a plan. I remember thinking 'no one is going to give you anything. You need to go out there and find it for yourself.' I think that sustainability comes from willingness to change and adapt to the need of my clients. I am learning as I go with no real mentor or guide in the fitness/wellness world. I have to be willing to accept when an idea is not working or a path is not clear. Sometimes all you have to do is stop and look around to find your way again!
What are you most proud of? Go ahead, boast a little!
I am proud of me. I have been knocked down more than once and I always find a way to get back on my feet. I am a fighter and I do not give up easily. While my firery attitude has gotten me in trouble, it is also what drives me forward in the hardest situations. You can learn a lot of things in life from books and school but I think grit and determination come from your life experiences and struggles. I am grateful now for the struggles of my past... without them I am not sure how I would get out of bed today.
What was your biggest obstacle/fear and what was your turning point?
This is hard for me to answer. I am currently living my biggest fear. Learning how to be a widow, a single mom, the breadwinner, but hardest of all, I am learning how to be alone. I started dating my husband at 18 and we were pretty much inseparable. We lived together from 19 until he passed away last year at 39. He was my best friend, my biggest champion and in many ways the center of my world, even after we had children. Learning how to be myself without him to catch me has been a challenge I never anticipated. I regularly struggle with the guilt of enjoying life in the wake of Chris' death. Despite all the logical platitudes that I tell myself every smile, every laugh has a twinge of sadness knowing he isn't here. As for the turning point... I will have to get back to you, as I am not certain I have hit that point in my journey.
What’s the best advice you’d give to a younger you?
Don't sweat the small stuff and it is all small stuff. It's an idea I struggle with today and I can't help but think if I had learned that lesson as a teenager or young woman that maybe life would be a little easier today. I used to have a sign above my desk that said 'Quack like a duck.' It was a reminder to let things go... like water off a duck's back.
How do you stay motivated and purposeful when you feel overwhelmed?
I don't always stay motivated and I let that be ok. I don't have to be perfect or even close. Everyday does not have to be the best ever. Fighting my feelings, filling my days with busy work in the guise of motivation leaves me even more overwhelmed. So sometimes I just take deep breaths and acknowledge that my situation is overwhelming. It is more than I can handle. It is heartbreaking. I let myself cry and shout and feel whatever I need to feel. Then I get up and get on with the day.
Tell us a time when a perceived failure was actually a blessing in disguise or served you in a surprising way.
Remember that no? If it weren't for that no I never would have started Fortitude Fitness.
What is your favorite vice/guilty pleasure/strange habit? Come on now, we all have them!
Ice cream. I love it. I want to eat it every day. Once in Rome, I ate gelato from 5 different places in one day. I had the worst stomach ache but at the last place, Gelateria del Teatro, they had the most innovative flavor combos and I ended up going back 3 different times to try more. I would go back and live that day 100 times!
What's the smartest investment you’ve made for yourself?
Focusing on my health and fitness. After having twins I lost myself a little. Getting back in the gym and reconnecting with my passion has served me in ways I never imagined. Through Chris' illness and now after his death I was able to use my time in the gym to stay connected to me. To recharge myself. I need the endorphins from exercise to keep my head above water. And now I am turning that passion into a profession that will provide for my family.
Share 1-2 books that have impacted you the most:
The Profit by Kahlil Gibran and 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez and Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole... All for different reasons!
What have you learned to say no to?
Nothing. It is a work in progress!
What's something surprising about you?
I have imposter syndrome. I live in constant fear that at any moment I am going to be found out as a fraud.
What’s MOST important to you right now?
Every breath I get to take. And my kids, of course!
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